2 more days of work and I am going back! Yeah! Finally, my long-deserved break!

And Bunny will be joining me. I want to bring him to so many places! I want him to try all the food that I like! I want him to carry my shopping bags! I want to celebrate his birthday with him! I need to plan something. Still thinking what kind of surprise I should give him.

So tired now but I am so happy. After 5 days of work, 4 tuition and 1 silly party, I will soon enjoy 5 days break. No work. No tuition. Just shopping (Bunny paying!).

Sis also took her day off....

I am addicted to online shopping (http://www.taiwan-shopaholic.blogspot.com/). Omg! 

Here are some of the photos taken...

Had dinner with my bunny last night at East Coast Waruku Japanese restaurant...

Daddy, Happy Father's day.

Time flies. It has been a year since you left. It feels like you are still around. Just that you are in Hong Kong and here I am in Singapore.

Visited you last week. I still can't help but started to cry just like that. I wish I can tell you what happen at work. I wish I can give you money to spend every month when I get my salary. I wish you can still cut fruits for me to eat...

Whatever that I can't give to you, I will provide them for mummy. I will take good care of her.

I love you daddy!

I don't know if you are reading this. If you are, I want to say Thank you! The necklace you gave me is lovely.

I shouldn't have the time to write this. But you are now out with your friends so I am spending some time on my own. Just want to let you know I miss you.

Can see what it says? it says

"one who stand up for me, one who supports me n one who encourages me. I'm so lucky!"

So sweet of her... i think i only stand up for her once. A bit guilty. : )

Spend xmas at my sis's new home. She and her husband invited their friends to their new home for house warming and celebrate xmas. We had gift exchange and they really had fun i think.

Christmas is coming! Finally I have my first xmas which I can buy whatever I like without having to worry about $$. But the sad thing is I can't find anything i like. This year I am suppose to get a gift for jac. Glad she loves what I get for her. And my secret present is from Jen! Thanks Babe! Love your present. Well the gathering was great except one person didn't like her gift and Li Ping had to leave early.


Wonder what's the empty space in the photo for? Ha... is for Li Ping who is missing from the photo!

Sometimes I wish I can have more time everyday. Mummy seems to be unhappy. I know she is bored at home. I wish I can have more time for her. Last Saturday, I just finished my tuition classes. When she was unlocking the gate, she told me, "I am so bored at home!" What she said make me feel really sad. I thought earning more money, giving her more money to spend is the best way to love her. Maybe I am wrong.

Studying CFA was tougher than I thought it would be. Not that the material is difficult, just that I can't find motivation to study most of the time. I am tired. I hope I can be more focus. Then again, I think about why I choose to do it. I just want to have better qualification so that I can find a better job. A job that can enables me to earn more and give my mummy a better life.

Daddy, I miss you.

Life is fragile. Time is precious. Everyday is a new start.

Daddy, I wish you can be there. I did what you wanted me to achieve.

广华医院四楼西翼， 8号房5号床，那是他最后睡的地方。看着他怒力地跟病魔作战，我却只能无能为力地在一旁看着，我还有好多好多话想跟您说，好多好多地方要带您去，还有我的毕业典礼... ... 您说会参加我的毕业典礼，您说要看我穿着毕业袍，戴着毕业帽，和我拍照的... ... 您不在，一切都好像没有意义了。

好想您，您知道吗？

第一天到医院看您是2月18日。我告诉自己要坚强，不能在您面前流眼泪，可是我做不到。您看起来是多麽的脆弱，我是多麽的伤心。突然间觉得很无助，很不知所措。不知道该怎么做才能让您舒服一点，不知道该为您打气还是为您伤心。看到您这么辛苦，我能做的又是些什么？医院不懂是做什么的，每天只让我们看您两个小时，每次只让两个人同时看您。每次有人来看您，我就只能离开您的身边，到病房外等候。等候的时间是最难熬的，我没有办法不胡思乱想，没有办法不伤心难过。两个小时好快就过了，妈和我都不舍得离开。直到护士赶我们走，我们才依依不舍地向您说bye bye。在您脸上吻了一下，希望能让您感到安心一点。我知道您好舍不得我们离开，我们也好想一整夜呆在您身边。

第二天到医院看您，我一直盼望奇迹的出现，希望看到您的病情好转，看到您又像以前一样，能说话，能动能走，还能和我一起玩sudoku。我和妈一早就跑到医院，要见见医生，问问您的病情。护士让我们到您的床边等候。一看到您，我们真的开心极了。赶快看看您的情况如何，帮您抹抹手和脸，又用水帮您滋润您乾乾的嘴和舌，帮你按摸手脚。我不知道我们所做的有没有让您舒服一点，心里也很乱很急很不安。我知道您的气息看起来并没有比昨天好，可是我真的不敢说出口，我知道妈妈看到您没有起色，心里已经很难过，我只能安慰她，对她说您一定会好起来，一定要有信心。护士说要见医生，就要先预约，所以没见到医生。护士让我们呆多一下，就要我们离开，等探病时间到了再来。急急忙忙再帮你按摸，帮您抹身体，再用水弄湿您的嘴和舌，直到护士要我们走，我们才逼于无奈的离开。回家的途中，心里一直想办法要怎么减轻您的痛苦。好无助，好伤心，好急躁，越想越不放心，越想越不安，只希望时间快点过去，才能到医院去看您。

探病时间又到了，我还是抱有希望，希望看到您的病情有好转。也许我在欺骗自己，可是如果要我相信爸爸并不会好，对我来说真的太残忍。如果连我也不抱有希望，我又怎能让您继续努力去对抗病魔？终于见到了医生，可是我没有得到我要的结果。医生说您的情况不太乐观，病情只会每况愈下，要我们做好心理准备。当时的我真的很不知所措，心里一直在想为什么连一个希望都不给我们？为什么让爸爸受那么多苦，才说出这样的话？在床上躺着的您不知道是否有听到医生的那一番话，连我自己也不知道该不该让您知道。我真怕医生的那一番话会让您心灰意冷，让您更伤心。

第三天，二月二十日。那天 是我一生中最后一次能和您四目交投。如果我知道您的情况是那么坏，我绝不离您半步... ...

那天， 我知道您真的很痛苦，因为一到医院，就看到您流着眼泪凝视着天花板。每一次呼吸，都是您用着仅有的力气去争取的。看您这么努力，就算用力到眉头都皱了也没有放弃，我的心都碎了。整个人乱了。爸爸，我真的不知道该怎么办好！我恨不得自己能分担你的痛，我恨不得能知道您在想什么。我知道您有好多好多话想说，您还尝试在我手心写字，可是我却没有办法了解您想写什么。爸爸，对不起！当了您的女儿这么久，却连您想说什么也不懂，真的很对不起。哥和妹都不在您身边，我就只能如此无能为力... ... 真没用!

看到您这么痛苦，被病痛折磨着，想要替您换身上的衣服让您舒服一点，却显得鸡手鸭脚... ... 您看起来好脆弱，跟从前的您好不一样。妈妈哭着说让您走您就不会这么辛苦，我还忍着眼泪生气地要她不要这么说。爸，要您加油是我太自私吗？我好舍不得您，我还没有让您看到我的成就，让您以我为傲... 您还没看我穿婚纱，参加我的婚礼... 您还要帮我的孩子取名字，看他们慢慢长大，等他们叫你公公... 临走前，吩咐护士給您止痛药，也不知道这样能不能尽量减轻您的痛苦，让你好睡一点。

回家的途中，有一点不安。预感不是很好，所以我和妈妈决定隔天一早要到医院看您。我写好要对您说的话，妈妈也准备好东西。躺在床上，我翻来覆去，我一直告诉自己快点睡，明天一早又能看到您，好不容易睡着了，也不知道睡了多久，被妈妈上厕所吵醒了，突然电话响了！我的心一沉，我知道应该是医院打来的电话，虽然我还想安慰自己，可是我却自然地跳下床。妈妈拿起电话，从她颤抖的声音我知道大概是个坏消息。护士说爸爸好想不行了，我以为我会崩溃，可是我却出奇的镇定。妈要我打电话给妹妹和哥。您知道吗？在那一刻，我还是觉得你会没事。

赶到了医院，看到您闭着眼睛躺在床上，就好想睡着了一样。我叫着您，可是您没有醒来，我抱着您哭，可是您还是没有醒来... ... 爸爸，为什么不等我赶到才走？醒来看看我，安慰我，好吗？

爸爸，我很爱您，不要丢下我们好吗？

My gosh! Sometimes we just trust pp too much. Trust them so much that we invite them to our house during CNY. And what kind of thing they can do to us? Steal our handphone! So ridiculous. I can't believe this. Then give all kind of excuses. I just thought that person should just admit he or she is at fault. If you can do it, then dare to admit it. WTF!

I got another offer. A job that has less OT and does not have to work on public holiday. Mummy complaining that I always come back late. As if I have a choice. But well, I guess I do have a choice and I choose to go and work elsewhere. I have been working so many hours that I can't even meet my friend. Though they are going to give me days off, But the hour is really too irregular. I hate not being able to plan with so much uncertainties.

I hope I am making the right decision.